tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6958766762972922702.post4573841028055370855..comments2019-11-02T07:00:30.939-05:00Comments on Pro Caritate Veritatis: Marriage Validity & Indissolubility (Part 1)CaseyThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16323015436136011866noreply@blogger.comBlogger1125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6958766762972922702.post-78744328612549872852010-09-17T04:42:23.697-05:002010-09-17T04:42:23.697-05:00I would like to add that some of this validity inv...I would like to add that some of this validity involves the deep spiritual desire to let God into the relationship from the beginning. My husband had a child born out of wedlock 5 years and 5 days before he met me. It took not only the sacraments (esp. Reconciliation), but a deep commitment on our part to God, his daughter, and each other to reach a point where we could emotionally and physically give ourselves completely by the time we married, 19 months to the day after meeting. God's GRACE is what allowed that to happen and if we both weren't open to it, we wouldn't have stayed together, let alone married. I share this so people know you can get past what looks impossible in a (potential) relationship with God's help. When I told him I was a virgin his response was one of prayer, Reconciliation (he'd actually done that way before meeting me), and doing all he could (emotionally and spiritually) to reclaim his ability to give himself fully in marriage. If I hadn't been open to meeting, getting to know, and dating a guy with a child, God wouldn't have led me to the man who, despite prior indiscretions, was the man God fully planned and prepared for me. His parents say it took years of their hard prayers for God to send me to their area of the country and to their son.<br /> It is with deep sorrow that I look at our wedding photos and see that a groomsman and greeter are now divorced from each other as are a bridesmaid and a lector. What were they missing? I'm sure I'll never know all the details for sure. Proper marriage prep helps immensely. We initially had the same marriage prep instructor as one of the now-divorced couples. She never questioned them living together and having sex before marriage (yikes!), but was very hung up on the fact that my husband had a child out of wedlock. She judged and threatened us. We later learned she had anger due to a personal family situation. We checked with her pastor/boss and 3 other priests who knew us. In the end, all but her approved of our marriage and we found better folks to handle our marriage prep. I also later learned she didn't teach marriage prep in the right order and manner. That saga is not for here, though. One thing is certain: the other couples didn't have the willingness/strength/perseverance to pray it out. Starting out by having premarital sex and living together didn't help either. My husband's poor experiences of both those things with my step-daughter's mother are what helped him strongly desire to do things in the right order by the time he met me. <br /> In 4+ years of marriage we've been through custody issues, serious financial issues, job losses by each of us, losing our house, and a potential serious health problem by one of us. None of these things were easy. Did we fight, cry, yell, say things we didn't mean at the time during those trials? SURE. But each time we've come back to God, prayer, and the sacraments and we've come out ok on the other end. I'm confident we'll continue to do so. God bless you Casey & Amanda! Keep doing what you're doing and you'll have an amazing, blessed marriage.Kant Thinkhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02361889435356515176noreply@blogger.com